So, I have been very diligent with my Bio Oil application. Apparently Bio Oil, above (available, on sale, at Chemist Online from £4.99) is the only thing to keep those pesky stretch marks at bay.
It is quite nice applying a daily oil. It leaves my skin feeling supple and happy and reassuringly elastic. Of course, there are those people who say that the appearance of stretch marks is all in the genes and that your get what you're given, if you know what I mean, even if you are a diligent oil applier like myself. I'm happy to report, and I'm sure she won't be too embarressed for you to know, that my dearest darling Mummy is stretch mark free, so I'm hopeful.
Anyway, I digress. So I'm committed to Bio Oil, but what with moonlighting as a beauty writer on some days, I receive many declarations of product brilliance via my Times inbox.
One such email used that persuasive tool called The Los Angeles Celebrity Factor. If they like it over there, then it must be good, it said - and I thought. So the product, complete with unfortunate name, SilDerm, was ordered and arrived at my desk.
Once I got it home, and on the bump, I was pleased with the natural ingredients and potent, relaxing lavender scent. Those celebs, they're so ahead of the game.
That was until this morning, when I ruined the new paint job in our indulgently decorated Farrow and Ball French Grey loft room. It turns out that SilDerm's nifty spray nozzle isn't so nifty after all. It sprays oil in an upwards direction, even when you are very careful and cup your hands and point it downwards for safety's sake. So now, thanks to the fear of stretch marks, we have an oil splattered room. And it looks like we may need to fall back on Darling Husband's DIY brilliance and do a little paint-over jobby. I bet those celebrities have special wipe down uber-paint that laughs at a few specks of oil.
Anyway, there is a moral to this story. And I think it involves our fully tiled bathroom....
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